Quick backstory: We didn't meet on the job — we were dating for almost four years before we started working together (which, by the way, wasn't planned … But for about 11 months, we sat three cubes apart from one another and kept our relationship under wraps. People sometimes act differently at work than they do in their personal life. No need to send a blast email with "the news" of you and your cube-mate's new relationship.
But they happen all the time, and when they do, there are three possible outcomes: The relationship turns sour and your reputation and career take a beating; it ends, but you're both mature and cordial and don't let the breakup affect your work; or A survey by Career Builder last year revealed that nearly 40% of employees admitted to having a romantic relationship with a coworker, and almost one-third of office relationships result in marriage. We are getting married in two months.) It's up to you to figure out whether pursuing an office relationship is worth the possible consequences, good and bad. My situation was unique because we were already a couple before we started working together — but generally that isn't the case, and Lynn Taylor, a national workplace expert and the author of "Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job," suggests you try being friends in-and-outside the office before you make any moves.
IT HAS been estimated that up to half of us meet our future partners through or at work, which makes it a significant venue for budding romance.
There are obvious plus points to meeting your partner at work: 1.
Your heart starts beating faster, and blood rushes to your head. Now you're in a relationship with your subordinate. And what happens when it comes to conducting reviews and disciplining your honey? You'll need a lot of energy and concentrated effort to keep your office romance just between the two of you.
If you're smart, you will deal with the real world and anticipate plenty of bloodshed before this tale concludes.
The most common cliché is that of the boss with his secretary but there are many other examples of work-based relationships, from the snog at the Christmas party to getting frisky in the supplies cupboard.
Work-based relationships aren’t always superficial and it is almost inevitable that at some point in your career you’ll develop a crush on someone at work.
If you sit together in the company cafeteria, will people now feel they should give you privacy?
Work is a way of test-driving a potential partner (ie getting to know them) before taking the plunge and asking them out. Etiquette: Dating a work colleague requires a good amount of old-fashioned social etiquette, not because it will make you any more attractive but because it will make the whole process a lot more comfortable and a lot less difficult, if and when the whole thing ends. Working with someone means forging an effective relationship.
Better still, you'll be seeing them during the day, rather than just propping up a bar with them in the evening. Work together during the day, pop out for a quick drink after work, Bob's your uncle. Everything is in order, from stress-busting massage at the desk to on-site counselling, so why not pick a mate there too? Hinting that you would like to take things further but never being specific can make the whole relationship uncomfortable, especially if it's a boss/employee situation.
This system obviously has advantages over night-time pick-ups in darkened clubs, holiday romances, (notoriously short-lived), or blind dates arranged by friends. High-powered City workers of the Nineties are accustomed to using the office as a complete life- support system. Making a pass is a dangerous manoeuvre in the workplace. Trying to blur the lines between business and pleasure will appear sleazy.
If your interest is not reciprocated you could be accused of sexual harassment or - at least - end up looking sad and sleazy once the office gossips have done their worst. How highly do you value this person as an employee/ colleague/ friend? This would entail getting someone to work late at the office and then taking them out for a meal "because it's too late to go home and cook" or taking them away on a business conference and making sure your rooms are next door to one another. Working well with someone means being relaxed with them - and that is impossible if you're not sure whether they're trying to seduce you or not.